10 Top tips to help your child become more resilient for back to school

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1. In the morning when you’re getting dressed, imagine what a great day you’ll have. Think of the skills and qualities you’ll need and imagine putting them on as you dress, like your armour, to keep you safe and strong. You have a great many skills and qualities. If you find yourself thinking of an activity rather than a skill, ask yourself “so what skills must I have to be good at that thing?” and the same if you mention a school subject, “so what skills do I have that make me good at that subject?”.
2. As you have breakfast, imagine stoking up on positive energy. Calibrate how positive you feel on a scale of 1-10 and start thinking of things that make you happy that can take it up the scale.
3. On the way to school, list the things you’re looking forward to; making new friends, seeing old friends, meeting new teachers, exploring new topics, learning new sports, enjoying familiar sports and so on.
4. As you walk into the school playground, make eye contact with someone you know and walk over for a chat. Someone on their own will be very glad you did. If there’s a group, join in their conversation rather than starting a new one.
5. Everyone’s a bit nervous on the first day, so go easy on yourself and others. Be friendly. If you don’t get a good response, it may not be about you. If you haven’t said or done anything wrong, it may just be nerves on their part. Give them another chance.
6. If you feel a bit overwhelmed, which is perfectly normal, take yourself somewhere quiet and breathe. Breathe in for 6 and out for 6. Moving your breath around the body is the fastest way to ease any anxiety.
7. Smile, laugh and respond positively when you can. It eases the tension everyone will be feeling on the first days. Be agreeable. You may not support the same football team or like the same music, but you are all in the same situation, probably missing home, feeling sad the holidays are over and worrying about anything and everything so look for what you have in common, not the differences.
8. You will feel resilient when you take responsibility for yourself. Make a note of your homework, what you need each day and focus in the lessons. It’s so hard after weeks of not having to, so go easy on yourself and get some early nights and eat well. It’s called self-care.
9. If things really haven’t gone well here’s what to do to build yourself up for tomorrow. Fine a quiet place and put your phone on silent. Now do that breathe in for 6 and breathe out for 6 (it’s called heartmath breathing). Then think of one thing that has gone well. Now think of what one thing you want to do more of or less of tomorrow and imagine yourself doing it. Then remind yourself what you’re grateful for even if it’s just the chance to do better tomorrow.
10. To help you get to sleep do a body scan. Lie in bed and imagine a beam of energy from your eyes to your big left toe then imagine that beam going across your toes and under your feet. Feel the bedclothes under them. Then travel that beam up your body, squeeze and relax each muscle as you move towards your head. Then take the beam back down the right side of the body, again squeezing and relaxing each muscle along the way.

 

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